sadness and despair

My period arrived early this morning. That means, up until last night, I was a pressure bubble of sadness and despair. Typical for just before. I didn't want to go to lyra. I made myself. And I regretted that decision. Yes, it's possible to regret a workout. Sometimes, it can make things worse.

My head is clearer today. In fact, I noticed the MOMENT my brain started to right itself. It felt as if a faucet had been turned on, you know like when the a/c kicks on and you can suddenly feel cool air? That's what it felt like. I emailed my husband to tell him he should be grateful he's a boy and never has to endure that sensation of feeling like the world is going to end yet in the next moment, oh wait, everything's fine, I think. I still feel a bit emotionally hungover.

Strength was shot last night. Even my trusty side mount was hard. Everything was super scary too, way up there in the high hoop. But I made myself do a back balance. I didn't let go, of course. But I got up there.